Homestuck.XYZ 2.0

kingof555 wrote: ↑

Tue Mar 31, 2020 6:33 pm

granted. it just causes worse problems

i wish that and were more in the style of

Granted. But now it is a severe social faux pas to use any of the three.

I wish I could achieve my deepest hopes and dreams

23toedbasket wrote: ↑

Wed Apr 01, 2020 4:44 am

kingof555 wrote: ↑

Tue Mar 31, 2020 6:33 pm

granted. it just causes worse problems

i wish that and were more in the style of

Granted. But now it is a severe social faux pas to use any of the three.

I wish I could achieve my deepest hopes and dreams

Granted. But the hopes and dreams you achieve are your TRUE hopes and dreams, not just the ones you think you have.

I wish quarantine would end so I could see my SO.

granted: they're bitter due to long term isolation.

i wish that iphone autocorrect would have an option to leave out apostrophes so i could leave it on without it clashing with my typing style.

Granted, but now people can't understand you at all!

I wish a Good God existed

Granted.

I wish for my brain to function correctly.

Granted, but you're so used to its sub-optimal functionality that normalcy is overwhelming! you wish you never did this...

I wish the forum adventures would get more attention

Granted. The forums go down due to a denial-of-service attack which might've been from a bitter fan and might've been from the sheer amount of people using them. All the information is corrupted and the fandom must band together to make MSPA Forums^3.

I wish for Karkat to finally develop healthy amounts of self-esteem.

Karkat develops massive amounts of self esteem, all at once, but it's only because he is now fused with Caliborn inside of an insidious puppet, instead of dear sweet Equius.

Toblerone give me the focus to actually make significant progress on my writing projects

The toblerone gives you the focus you seek. But now you are mentally FIXED on your projects. You pour your very soul into these works and begin to forge an utter masterpiece... unfortunately it is the only thing you can focus on. Luckily you die of hunger and thirst before your personal relationships can fall away. Your funeral is well populated, and your writing projects go unfinished.

I wish the Covid would stop takin' our jobs

Granted, COVID-19 is gone
COVID-20 takes over

I wish I had headsets that lasted more than two weeks

PilotBlackSmith wrote: ↑

Sat Apr 11, 2020 1:27 pm

I wish I had headsets that lasted more than two weeks

Granted, you now have a headset that lasts for two weeks... and a day.

O, great broblerone, I wish Animal Crossing was real. Not like the games are real, but more like the ANIMAL CROSSING UNIVERSE ITSELF. like a parallel dimension of sorts.

dg125 wrote: ↑

Sun Apr 12, 2020 9:10 am

O, great broblerone, I wish Animal Crossing was real. Not like the games are real, but more like the ANIMAL CROSSING UNIVERSE ITSELF. like a parallel dimension of sorts.

granted. you are transported into a town of your least favorite villagers, and you're forever trapped in it so that you spend all eternity with preprogrammed nonsentient entities.

i wish for fetch modi to be real

They are, but you accidentally install one that immediately capchalogues things, and can't quite figure out how to get them back out. Or install a different modus. You forevermore become that one guy that you shouldn't leave important things around. Life is hell.

I wish Aysha, Kate, and Co. stopped using twitter permanently.

granted, they use this forum instead.

I wish I never read homestuck and got into something that woudnt make me seethe forever

Granted, you get really into problem sleuth and just seethe most of the time

I wish I could get my sleep schedule back on track!

Granted. You wake up just in time for a god of death to kill everyone who is currently awake.

can red karpeta be canon

Red karpeta is now canon. However, an angry mob of protesting fans manage to make enough of a stink against it that they convince the current writer(s) to kill off Karkat, leaving Nepeta sad and alone :<

Dear Toblerone, I wish Jane didn't become a xenophobic and power-hungry ass upon settling down on Earth C.

Jane is no longer a fascist like she was in the Epilogues and Homestuck 2, however that void is filled with more Dirk, making him even worse in the new canon.

I wish I could stop burning my pancakes.

You stop burning them but now can't help but undercook them. Your pancakes are now gooey battergrist gushers contained in a thinly cooked membrane.

I wish the mods would wake up from their ancient slumber

RancidRancor wrote: ↑

Wed Apr 22, 2020 6:11 pm

I wish the mods would wake up from their ancient slumber

Granted, The mods are now the only people active on the forums.

I wish for a canon adventure taking place in the Beforus SGRUB session.