Homestuck.XYZ 2.0

I raise my hands in defeat, then go to my NUCLEAR BUNKER and fire a sidewinder ballistic missile at Mr. Wall from a distance so the guards can't stop me.

I order Donald Trump to build a larger wall to make Mr. Wall feel so inferior that he commits Seppuku.

I protect the hug machine with all of my might, hoping to heal it with the power of love

I draw a curious elf on the wall with teal paint.

I dropkick WALL GUARD 2 and steal his weapon, signaling my teammates to get rid of WG1 and WG3.

Following aspiringWatcher's plan as he is taking down WG2 I try to take down WG3 from the back and steal his weapon

I /ban and /ipban the Wall. Hey, it's not like its a godmodder who can defend themselves?

I summon the Nega-Trump to unbuild the Wall!
(Also, hi there).

I summon Pink Floyd, who perform a masterful rendition of "Another Brick in the Wall." The wall is moved to tears and suffers catastrophic emotional damage!

Sudenly I dawn the legendary CODPIECE and start teleporting around and shoveling it in the wall guards face to distract them. After a few seconds of this shenanigans the CODPIECE wearing me turns out to have been just an illusion as the real me was busy setting up C4 all along the wall.how did I set up C4 across the entire wall if the wall is infinite you ask? Well the wall may be infinite I have the power of Infinity^3. As the C4 exsplodes the CODPIECE ILLUSION vanishes, wait no it doesn't. It seems like the CODPIECE ILLUSION didn't like being just an illusion so it willed itself to become a CODPIECE CLONE

ohkay this is getting a lot more cluttered than i anticipated. Maybe a DtG type thing wasn't a very good idea on a huge forum for somebody with a low work ethic. Don't worry, i'll keep going as long as i can manage before it gets TOO stressful for myself. That may not be long though, so i apologize if i end up conking out a little early into this thread's life. I'll have someone take over in their own thread if i end up stepping down.

BrobyDDark wrote: ↑

Mon Dec 02, 2019 7:33 pm

Summon my stand, [Blue Mondays], to roughly assault the wall.

You do -100 damage to WG1, since he takes the full force of the attack!

calamityCons wrote: ↑

Mon Dec 02, 2019 7:38 pm

I raise my hands in defeat, then go to my NUCLEAR BUNKER and fire a sidewinder ballistic missile at Mr. Wall from a distance so the guards can't stop me.

WG1 uses an anti-air against the missile, not without some debris
"why would we only have spears to protect the wall with? what are we ? cavemen?
"well i mean YOU are"
"a caveman i mean
"woah would you look at that, the 'go fuck yourself' alarm is ringing and it's right at you buddy"

galileanTactician wrote: ↑

Mon Dec 02, 2019 8:18 pm

I order Donald Trump to build a larger wall to make Mr. Wall feel so inferior that he commits Seppuku.

How do you order someone higher than you t- oh wait he's doing it

Mr. Wall 2.0 1/7 You better protect him while he's building it!
Donald Trump: 620/620 HP

RoyalFiddle wrote: ↑

Tue Dec 03, 2019 2:33 am

I protect the hug machine with all of my might, hoping to heal it with the power of love

You start to protect The Hug Machine! 50% damage to THM will be redirected to yourself during this time.

Generalrabogolfo wrote: ↑

Tue Dec 03, 2019 6:12 am

I draw a curious elf on the wall with teal paint.

You draw an elf on the wall. He suddenly pops out of it and scampers off! Godspeed, little man.

aspiringWatcher wrote: ↑

Tue Dec 03, 2019 8:19 am

I dropkick WALL GUARD 2 and steal his weapon, signaling my teammates to get rid of WG1 and WG3.

donk. WG2 is down for the moment, -50 hp to WG2. You pick up his spear and do tell your team to get rid of the others.

Crpal wrote: ↑

Tue Dec 03, 2019 2:32 pm

Following aspiringWatcher's plan as he is taking down WG2 I try to take down WG3 from the back and steal his weapon

WG3, immediately noticing his friend get taken down for the time being, whips around, anticipating an attack. In retaliation he swipes at your feet, tripping you up and causing you to fall over. Unfortunately for him, you were able to grab hold of his spear and you both fall. -50 HP to WG3 and Crpal

gutza1 wrote: ↑

Tue Dec 03, 2019 8:41 pm

I /ban and /ipban the Wall. Hey, it's not like its a godmodder who can defend themselves?

Unfortunately, Mr. Wall is the creator of the server, and you cannot ban him.

TrickleJest wrote: ↑

Wed Dec 04, 2019 1:43 pm

I summon the Nega-Trump to unbuild the Wall!
(Also, hi there).

(oh hey its that omegaupdate guy hello)
Nega-Trump gets summoned, but since regular trump is on your team, he joins Mr. Wall's team! DAMN RIVALRIES!!!

splashcat wrote: ↑

Thu Dec 05, 2019 1:36 pm

I summon Pink Floyd, who perform a masterful rendition of "Another Brick in the Wall." The wall is moved to tears and suffers catastrophic emotional damage!

Mr. Wall doesn't actually like Pink Floyd. What a dick.

MP the OP OG wrote: ↑

Thu Dec 05, 2019 2:20 pm

Sudenly I dawn the legendary CODPIECE and start teleporting around and shoveling it in the wall guards face to distract them. After a few seconds of this shenanigans the CODPIECE wearing me turns out to have been just an illusion as the real me was busy setting up C4 all along the wall.how did I set up C4 across the entire wall if the wall is infinite you ask? Well the wall may be infinite I have the power of Infinity^3. As the C4 exsplodes the CODPIECE ILLUSION vanishes, wait no it doesn't. It seems like the CODPIECE ILLUSION didn't like being just an illusion so it willed itself to become a CODPIECE CLONE

You attempt to distract the WG's, but the only one not pre-occupied is WG1, and he simply just stabs your... codpiece clone to get it to stop mucking around. Ouch. Real you attempts setting up C4 all across the wall, but now you only have 5! DAMN DIMENSION LOGICS!!! Either way, you do -100 damage to Mr. Wall.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mr. Wall: 9,644/10,000 HP [FLATTERED (egg)] (2/5 turns left)

Mr. Wall is pretty pissed y'all keep attacking his friends. Mr. Wall sends out a scatter bomb, which hits five of the opponents, picked randomly!
-50 damage to...

aspiringWatcher
gutza1
theartvoid
galileanTactician
Crpal

Wall Guard 1: 700/800 HP
Wall Guard 2: 600/650 HP
Wall Guard 3: 850/900 HP
Nega-Trump: 620/620 HP

WG1 is pretty pissed at Broby, so he stabs him in the gut, -60 damage to BrobyDDark
WG2 spends the turn re-adjusting himself.
WG3 tries taking a shot at Crpal, but he's incapable due to Crpal gripping WG3's spear, and a generally unfavorable battle position.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
calamityCons: 200/200 HP
Crpal: 90/200 HP (ouch)
BrobyDDark: 140/200 HP
RoyalFiddle: 200/200 HP
aspiringWatcher: 150/200 HP
sigmatic: 200/200 HP
theartvoid: 150/200 HP
galileanTactician: 150/200 HP
Generalrabogolfo: 200/200 HP
gutza1: 150/200 HP
TrickleJest: 200/200 HP
splashcat: 200/200 HP
MP the OP OG: 200/200 HP
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Hug Machine:400/500 HP
Donald Trump: 620/620 HP
Mr. Wall 2.0: 1/7

(people who haven't responded in say, 2 OP posts will get temp removed to protect them from unfair death.)

I look appon the CODPIECE CLONE in disgust. Then I realize that If I don't do anything to distinguish us people will begin to think that I'm like that hethin! So I dawn a tie and become BUREAUCRATIC and I use my new powers of BUREAUCRACY and REGULATION to set the minimum damage for attacks against the wall at 100. Meanwhile the CODPIECE CLONE is prity pissed at being stabbed so it pulls a string attached to it's CODPIECE that was totally there before. This causes the falic part of the CODPIECE to start vibrating like a chainsaw. Then it teleports behind WG1 and says "Ohmiwa mo shindiu" before cutting it with the vibrating part of it's CODPIECE witch now apparently can cut things like a chainsaw.

I fire a sperm whale at the wall with my missile launcher. Try to justify killing THAT, Wall Guards!

Seeing that Trump is now the one we're depending upon to damage the Wall, I cringe a bit before deciding to make the most out of the situation! I summoned the famed Youtuber Jreg to guard and bolster Trump's efforts through the power of Anti-Centrism, which will also allow individuals or groups of different political ideologies to collaborate with him on the wall-building effort!

I summon Nostalgia Critic's The Wall in attack mode!

I push Trump into Nega-Trump, resulting in mutual annihilation - which should hopefully cause an explosion large enough to damage the Wall!

I do a secret communist chant and heals everybody 22hp, if someone is at full health, they'll get 22hp more permanently.

I spend my turn maiming WALL GUARD 2 to minimise his attack capability, using his own SPEAR for bonus moral damage: poking him in the eyes, arm tendons, groin, other bits more valuable than durable. If I can one-shot him, do that instead. I also signal my team to subdue WALL GUARD 1.

Even though I'm pretty severely injured, I'm also super pissed off. I try to follow AspiringWatcher's order to attack WG1 with WG3's spear but get distracted and try to attack the wall with WG3's spear.

Crpal is apparently not too smart.

I arrive on the scene with a backpack full of climbing gear and nothing else. I throw my grappling hook as high up on Mr. Wall as I can.